Published on September 17, 2006 By KFC Kickin For Christ In Home & Family
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING CONTENT CONTAINS SERIOUS MOMMY BLOG MATERIAL. THOSE, ESPECIALLY OF THE MALE PERSUASION BE FOREWARNED. THOSE QUITE COMFORTABLE IN THEIR MANHOOD OR THOSE WHO ARE SO INCLINED TO PERUSE A MOMMY BLOG, FEEL FREE TO CONTINUE.......LOL.

Anyone who has raised more than one child knows quite well there is quite a difference in attitude from that first little bundle that is brought home to the last little one who completes the family. The more children you bring home the more you notice the difference in your own philosophy in babycare. Speaking from my own experience the following is not only very true for the most part, but also upon reflection, quite funny.

Does this sound familiar?

Your Clothes

1st Baby-You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd Baby-You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd Baby-Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes!!!

Preparing for the Birth

1st Baby-You practice your breathing religiously
2nd Baby-You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd Baby-You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

The Layette

1st Baby-You prewash newborn's clothes, color-cordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd Baby-You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd Baby-Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries

1st Baby-At the first sign of distress......a whimper, a frown.....you pick up the baby.
2nd Baby-You pick the baby up when his wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd Baby-You teach your three year old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Pacifier

1st Baby-If the pacifier falls to the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd Baby-When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd Baby-You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering

1st Baby-You change your baby's diaper every hour whether it needs to be or not.
2nd Baby-You change the diaper every two or three hours if needed.
3rd Baby-You try to change the diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Activities

1st Baby-You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour
2nd Baby-You take the baby to Baby Gymnastics
3rd Baby-You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

1st Baby-The first time you leave your baby with a sitter (if you even do that) you call home five times.
2nd Baby-Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd Baby-You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

1st Baby-You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd Baby-You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd Baby-You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Swallowing Coins

1st Child-When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd Child-When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for coin to pass.
3rd Child-When third child swallows a coin, you deduct it from his allowance.

....that is, if you even give them an allowance.

So with that, I'm looking forward to seeing my FIRST grandbaby being lovingly cared for by his brand new first-time mommy.


























Comments
on Sep 17, 2006
I have no doubt Amanda is gonna be a fabulous mommy.

And your article is funny and SO TRUE! heh.
on Sep 17, 2006
awww. cute.
on Sep 17, 2006
Haha, very funny and so true!
on Sep 17, 2006
Haha, very funny and so true!
on Sep 18, 2006
this was funny
on Sep 18, 2006
Very true!  By the time the last one came around, they got regular food, disposable diapers, and clean was not showing dirt.
on Sep 18, 2006
and clean was not showing dirt.


ya and when they got hurt we'd say....rub a little dirt in it.

on Sep 18, 2006

rub a little dirt in it.

Helps it scab over faster.