My home state of Maine is once again going to the polls tomorrow to vote on yet another homosexual issue. This time it's on whether or not homosexual marriage should be legalized. So far every state that puts this to a vote brings another loss to the homosexual movement. Not one state to date has had an affirmation by popular vote for homosexual marriage.
I know we hear and get caught up in some very emotional reasons as to why we should allow this but we really need to take a good look at what's going on in our culture when it comes to marriage and how it's affecting our children already.
Marriage is under attack. There was a time when going to the altar was a sacred committment that meant something. Until death due us part. Remember that? There was a time when a man and a woman were united as one, raised a family and sat back to enjoy the fruits of their labor in the benefits we call grandchildren. We still see some old dinosaurs out there who are still hanging on trying to keep the traditional home fires burning in a controlled sort of way, but it's getting to be a thing of the past more and more. We have now abandoned the home fires which are now burning out of control.
What has happened to all that? Where did we go wrong? Is it religion being taken out of our culture bit by bit? The invention of the pill leading up to a sexual revolution starting back in the 60's? Women working outside the home leaving husband and children to fend for themselves much of the time? Entertainment? Computers?
Heterosexuals haven't done such a great job in the marriage business these last 30 or 40 years but legalizing homosexual marriage isn't the answer. Marriage is on fire, and legalizing homosexual marriage is like adding gasoline to a blaze already burning out of control.
We are seeing the evidence of this in our kids. They are hurting. They have been burnt and are now suffering the consequences of marriages gone aflame. If you listen carefully you can actually hear the dull roar of the fire as it quickly spreads. This roar is angry, loud and invasive.
Look around. Have you not noticed the anger in our culture especially the younger generation? It's all making sense. What do we need to do to put this fire out? Anger manifests itself in many ways. Anger acts out.
Let me tell you what I saw yesterday. I saw seven hurting (last week there were 12) teenagers in Sunday School. Not one comes from a traditional homelife. Every single one of them is missing at least one parent in their lives. The common denominator is anger and frustration.
There's nothing like a big batch of homemade cookes to get a bunch of teens to warm up to you. Within moments we started to hear their heart wrenching stories. Some I've already posted on an earlier blog.
Our topic on this morning was anger. We taught them how we should be slow to speak, quick to hear and slow to anger. Doing so will alleviate many troubles in their lives and will save them from dire consequences. They were all too eager to share their problems with us about their emotional abusive step-fathers or in the case of one girl, a brother-in-law married to her sister who was raising her.
Where are the real biological parents? Why so many broken marriages? In the case of this girl, her sister is 22 years older than her and no talk of any mother or father in the picture. I'm guessing without this sister and her husband this 14 year old would be in foster care. She's a beautiful young 14 year old girl.
One boy has so much anger he has a court date next week to address it. He's now 18, follows me around showing me his notebook on how he's trying to change his life. I had the feeling he needs mothering. His father has been married at least 3 times and has two younger kids with his third wife who doesn't seem to be in the picture now.
Another boy I'll call JU sat in a back corner with his hat on backwards hardly looking at us. He wouldn't pick up the book, read along with us or share in the conversation. While I still know nothing about JU we got a report back this morning that immediately after Sunday School he pulled out of church a man he knew and wanted to talk about his anger issues. The older man said to my husband "I don't know what you taught about in class yesterday but it sure made an impression on JU. Enough to pull me out of church to talk to him for over a half hour."
Every child needs a mom and a dad. For a child to feel safe and secure he needs both of his parents to stay strong and committed not only to him but to each other. The best way a father can show a son about love is to show it for his wife. The best way a daughter can learn about how a woman should love and respect her husband is by watching her mother. What kinds of models do these kids have?
We seem so worried about the deficit and how it will affect our next generation but what about the trail of broken marriages leaving angry and displaced kids all over the place?
We need to go back and try to fix what's broken not add another dimension to an already troubled institution.